I wish I could take credit for this

After getting rid of so much stuff during the month of January and my 5 things challenge, my apartment sometimes feels cold and barren. Picture this, but with even less crap and clutter all over the place:

Sometimes we let the kids play with the big glowing egg in our living room. But only if they're good.

Anyway, I could use a few Precious Moments figurines or general knick-knacks to warm the place up. (Am I pulling all of this sarcasm off? I'm trying really hard and laying it on really thick).

I came across this list (courtesy of this page), which I hope will really help me clutter things back up.

20 Ways to Create Clutter

1. Whenever you stay at a hotel, take the tiny shampoos and soaps home with you. Don’t use them, though. Hoard them in your bathroom for the coming zombie apocalypse.

2. Treat your home like a museum. Be sentimental about everything, from your first-grade report card to family heirlooms.

3. Agree to store things indefinitely for other people, including your children.

4. If someone offers to give you something you don’t really need, like an extra set of dishes, say yes. It’s free, isn’t it?

5. Combining households with your sweetie? This is the perfect opportunity to bask in the thrill of double ladles, DVD players and litter boxes. Don’t be tempted to get rid of a single object; you never know when you might need those extra dining room chairs.

6. On to your wardrobe. Don’t weed out old things when you buy new ones, and keep clothing in a wide range of sizes in case you shrink or expand like Alice in Wonderland.

7. Solve all of your organizational issues in one fell swoop with a quick trip to The Container Store. Buy loads of stuff, but don’t measure spaces beforehand or create a clear plan for how you’re going to use them.

8. Deal with every stray emotion by going shopping. Spend more than you planned to so you can get the free gift at the cosmetics counter, even if you never use eye shadow or flavored lip gloss and already own enough toiletry bags to last a lifetime.

9. Take your “miscellaneous” pile of papers.
Sort papers according to category/subject/urgency.
Label each pile as such with a sticky note.
Paperclip each pile together.
File under “miscellaneous” in your filing cabinet.

10. Instead of appreciating what you have, dwell on the nagging feeling that you’re missing something important.

11. There’s nothing in a “free pile” that can’t become your new best friend. Broken TV’s become objects d’art, and rain-soaked couches transform into guest bedding for the in-laws!

12. Buy sale items because they are such an amazing deal, regardless of whether you actually need them.

13. If you can’t sell your old things for what you think they’re worth, keep them instead of donating them.

14. Take up a hobby or activity that requires lots of specialized gear or supplies, like ice hockey or scrapbooking. Oh, sure, it seems innocent now. Just wait until an entire room in your house has been devoted to your spouse’s model-train collection.

15. Out of sight, out of mind. If it’s tucked in a container or hidden away in a cupboard, it’s not clutter.

16. Speed up your impulse shopping by signing up for “flash sale” sites like Groupon.

17. Value quantity over quality.

18. Subscribe to half a dozen weekly magazines and a couple of newspapers, and refuse to get rid of anything until you’ve read all of them. Stack them until you can get there, ideally on tables that are slightly too small for them, enhancing the likelihood of landslides.

19. If you have a yard sale, put everything you can’t sell back in the basement until next year’s yard sale. Repeat annually.

20. When in doubt, box it up and put it into paid storage!

Happy Cluttering!


  1. This made me laugh really hard (as your blog usually does :))--especially the first, very sarcastic, segment. Hahaha...

  2. I love this, all of it!!! Just caught the post from Ethan's facebook page. Decided to quickly check it out while listening to the fighting and occasional crying of the kids one room over. Yep, they are mine and this is the perfect way to laugh away the awful time between when we say prayers and the 100 glasses of water I will need to get:-) I will be sharing your blog with all my girl friends. I had one sending me pictures of her de cluttering today and another that has graduated from her 30 day shred and is now onto something called INSANITY (Yikes). Keep up the good work,it's an encouragement to me **Lord knows I need it**

  3. this is going to be posted on my blog and on my facebook page -- i LOVED it!! thank you for your honesty. i have the 30 day shred - maybe i will attempt it again!

  4. saw this on esthers fb page. also posted. such a funny- yet true story!

  5. We've all fallen prey to holding on to those little hotel shampoos, haven't we? I mean, who can't relate:)


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